The Stupid Police

Just to clear things up, I'm not verbally downgrading our hardworking brave police force. Let me explain. When you become a parent, you adopt a new language. I don't mean that I had to cut out all my cursing and dirty jokes since neither have really been a part of my daily language. I'm referring to all the words that I use that don't seem acceptable for children to vocalize. Some may argue that if a 3 year old can't say it, then I shouldn't be able to say it. Well, I kind of get your point, but there are a lot of things that adults can do that kids shouldn't.

I also know that the Bible urges us to keep our language wholesome (Eph 4:29), which seems to be a daily chore for me when it comes to a certain word. Stupid.  When something irritates me? Stupid. Something isn't working correctly? Stupid. Dinner burned? Stupid.  Getting a family stomach bug? Really STUPID. I don't even go as far as to call other people stupid (usually, we all have our days), but it simply feels good to say it and helps me relieve tension. Ok, so it really is just me choosing to not have self control, but nonetheless, I like the word stupid.

We all know that when we have children, we really give birth to baby parrots. We can't wait for them to start talking and after they do we fear what may come out of their mouths. I know I do anyway. I have an overly talkative munchkin who repeats EVERYTHING he hears. This makes Parker sometimes out-of-control hilarious. Other times, Parker's words have made me want to put my tail between my legs and run. Shortly after he turned two, he began to call things stupid. Well, it was kind of obvious where he picked this one up at. Not that I think it is that bad, but since children (and some adults) don't know when and when not to say things, I was concerned he would get in trouble with his new word. I imagined him calling his preschool teacher stupid when she asked him to sit down. I decided to add the word stupid to the "we don't say..." list.

Parker is still at the age where he thinks that if he can't do something, then no one can do that certain something. Though he is partially right on this particular instance, he's still learning that different people have different guidelines and that life isn't fair. (This is a lesson that continues through life for all of us, I believe.) Anyway, Parker is the official Stupid Police. Every time the no-no word comes out of my mouth, or any one else's for that matter, you can expect a "we don't say stupid" to immediately come from Parker. And I'm serious that you have only about a nanosecond to correct yourself before the Stupid Police slaps those handcuffs on you. He takes his responsibility serious. He'll correct you faster than those parking meter cops in downtown Charleston. And don't think you can say it quietly. He hears the word stupid at any decibel. He can be intensely watching a movie or even be in another room playing with his cars when I slip. I naively think I've gotten away with it or even haven't realized I've said it and "WE DON'T SAY STUPID" comes ringing from his direction. There was even an instance (or two) when I was upset about something and his annoying "we don't say stupid" evoked a childish response from me. I looked right back at him and said, "Stupid. Stupid. Stupid."  What a great lesson I taught him that day.

I'm not perfect, and my precious little man is helping me learn to only say those things that would be
"helpful for building others up." Like I've said before, Parker has been placed in my life for many reasons and teaching me to be more like Christ is definitely one of them. Keep up your hard work, Stupid Police.

Ephesians 4:29- Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.


*The Stupid Police has a really cool pantless uniform and fire-enhanced accessory.