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Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Note to self...

I am a mother, therefore, I am a student. I learn more each day than I learned some semesters in college. Though the content may not be as deep and difficult, it's incredibly applicable and necessary for smooth living. I must start taking notes for myself and anyone who wants to learn from my misfortunes.

1. Leaving baby powder in a location that Graham can get to is catastrophic for the toy bench. I no longer need to paint it white.

2. Brownies are not as appealing after you change a nasty dirty diaper.

3. "Sidewalk" chalk is apparently an alias.  It's true name is brick chalk, green pepper plant chalk, window chalk, toy chalk, skin chalk, ball chalk, and little brother chalk.

4. Lunging back and forth across the yard with your toddler will make it difficult to walk the next day.

5. Your kids WILL find ways to make coincidental occurrences throw you off. (i.e. Graham will get a stomach virus the same day you first let him down a sippy cup of vitamin D milk. You will think he has an allergy or intolerance instead of a bug because kids are just good like that.)

6. You need to call and inform all the toy makers that kids really aren't in to all the bright colored junk, they really just want black controllers with gray buttons.

7. Weaning a baby can be easy as 1-2-3 or nearly impossible. They will either quit before you're ready or not want to stop when you're over it.

8. Cameras and other non-waterproof items have a strong affinity to kiddie pools.

9. The cutest shag rugs WILL make the most annoying fuzz balls show up EVERYWHERE in your home.

10. Doctors should charge less when they inadvertently tell you that your child is not sick, simply being a brat. Trust your instincts, it'll save you a $25.00 co-pay.

The lessons continue.

3 comments:

Unknown said...

LOL!! Number 5 and 6 are dead-on! I thought Henry was allergic to milk too but alas, it was a stomach bug. Oh, and is it just a boy thing or are all kids attracted to controllers??? Great post :-)

DavidandSteff said...

Emily, Henry did that too? so frustrating. And, I can't answer you on the second question because I have two boys...both obsessed with the flippin controller.

The Ness Story said...

You need to write a book. For real. You are so funny and I love to read about yalls little adventures! Miss you so much!